SINGLEHOOD...
ANY WORRIES?
I just decided to blog about this topic because of the
‘madness’ and stigma attached to either. The Married wished they were single,
regretting why they married; the Singles wished they had married to taste the
other side of life. Each believing that the grass is greener on the other side.
Life is in stages and
comes with its attendant challenges at each stage. Before one reaches puberty, he/she has understood
the functions of his various body parts. The body shapes starts changing
rapidly due to the activities of hormones. These body changes will definite
determine how they react to the opposite sex – each tending to show affinity to
the other sex. This is characterised in the adolescence stage where infatuation
is at work.
...AND NOW
THE CHILD IS GROWN AND HAS MATURED INTO AN ADULT ABLE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITIES....
Most things in life have two faces:
The coin has
front and back;
There is the
Good and the Bad;
Life and
death;
Riches and
poverty; And...
Singlehood
and marry hood.
There is nothing like in-between in life. The beauty of life is
ability to make choices. While one is faced with the challenge of defining
destiny, care should be taken on the type of choices to be taken.
Singlehood is not a crime as it has its own attendant advantages – though the society, parents and
peers tend to foist their ideologies down the minds of people, their children
and relations. It becomes a taboo to be single especially in Africa where grand
and great-grand children are hot cakes for parents. They will stop at nothing
to make sure their children marry even when they are not yet prepared for this.
Some parents go the extra mile of getting a suitor for their children without
their consent or contrary to their wish. One beauty of singlehood is it gives
opportunity for self discovery and self confidence building. You have the whole
time to mingle and hang out with friends and business associates. You can
travel as you like, feed as you like, maintain your house as you like and above
all, preserve your heart from emotional crashes associated with marriage.
Absolute liberty enjoyed in singlehood is the main criteria
why one may choose so or may choose to marry late to enjoy his/her youth. While one is on the queue of getting
married, you can still develop yourself, trying to make yourself a better
person to the society by working on your personal goals and ambitions, learning
some skills and knowledge because these may come under attack once married. You
may end up jettisoning them or postponing them because of family
responsibilities.
On the other hand, marry hood is good and has it’s
challenges. You feel confined in marriage. Your time, resources, personal life
and opinions may not fully have their courses. There is inter-dependency on both
couples. In marriage, there is a sense of belonging, burden sharing and
intimacy. Moreover, it provides an avenue for safe sex (provided none of the
couple indulges in extra marital affairs).
On the other hand, unhealthy and unhappy marriages
are the remote causes of stress and emotional strain among the affected
couples.
I close with this: it does not matter the divide you
find yourself...
Be
resolute;
Do
not compare yourself with others;
Focus
on your relationship;
Nurture
your friendships and family;
Be
yourself
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